You ever have a day where you want to give the world in general the finger? I'm having one. I don't know why. Maybe is has something to do with the fact that I am sick of being the better person at work and at home. I have a hard time taking crap from people, especially people I can't FRIGGING STAND!!! I'm really just getting burnt out on turning the other cheek. Those of you reading this know I'm not the best at just taking the high road. I am much better at direct confrontation. AAARGH!
Somethines, I just want to tell a select few people what I really think of their bullsh!t antics. And keep telling them until they actually get the message. What a freeing moment that would be. The problem is the fallout. I really don't like to hurt people's feelings, and more importantly, I'm not willing to help fix their drama or hurt feelings. I am pretty good at not caring what people think of me. Shocking...hahaha!
Since I started getting healthy in January, I have been trying to do things totally new to me. I signed up for a weekend of adventure, I have gained TONS of self control with my new eating habits, and I'm working really hard to just let things go that I can't change. (I wonder if they have an NA for b!tches? Maybe BA???)
I am happy with wearing a smaller size, but I am truly changing from the inside out. It is a really painful process to actually have to feel my feelings rather than ignore them. I guess that true change is painful. I am sure it's worth it. I have not cheated on my diet. In my office, it is a dieter's NIGHTMARE! Well-meaning residents bring all my fave goodies. I am just happy the holidays are over. I am missing my good friends brie and wine. I don't crave them, I just miss them. I will find new things to love... I really appreciate my husband telling me I inspire him on his diet. He said he's inspired by my self control. There's no secret to it - I just take one single day at a time. I tell myself that whatever I am feeling will pass. I just don't want to trade one addiction (food) for another (shopping).
I'm going to take my own advice now - I'm going to have a Coke and a smile and STFU! (I will substitute the Coke for a TSFL Shake - LOL!)
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