As Lily Allen puts it: "Eff you! Eff you very, very much!"

You ever have a day where you want to give the world in general the finger?  I'm having one.  I don't know why.  Maybe is has something to do with the fact that I am sick of being the better person at work and at home.  I have a hard time taking crap from people, especially people I can't FRIGGING STAND!!!  I'm really just getting burnt out on turning the other cheek.  Those of you reading this know I'm not the best at just taking the high road.  I am much better at direct confrontation.  AAARGH! 

Somethines, I just want to tell a select few people what I really think of their bullsh!t antics.  And keep telling them until they actually get the message.  What a freeing moment that would be.  The problem is the fallout.  I really don't like to hurt people's feelings, and more importantly, I'm not willing to help fix their drama or hurt feelings.  I am pretty good at not caring what people think of me.  Shocking...hahaha!

Since I started getting healthy in January, I have been trying to do things totally new to me.  I signed up for a weekend of adventure, I have gained TONS of self control with my new eating habits, and I'm working really hard to just let things go that I can't change.  (I wonder if they have an NA for b!tches?  Maybe BA???)

I am happy with wearing a smaller size, but I am truly changing from the inside out.  It is a really painful process to actually have to feel my feelings rather than ignore them.  I guess that true change is painful.  I am sure it's worth it.  I have not cheated on my diet.  In my office, it is a dieter's NIGHTMARE!  Well-meaning residents bring all my fave goodies.  I am just happy the holidays are over.  I am missing my good friends brie and wine.  I don't crave them, I just miss them.  I will find new things to love...  I really appreciate my husband telling me I inspire him on his diet.  He said he's inspired by my self control.  There's no secret to it - I just take one single day at a time.  I tell myself that whatever I am feeling will pass.  I just don't want to trade one addiction (food) for another (shopping).

I'm going to take my own advice now - I'm going to have a Coke and a smile and STFU!  (I will substitute the Coke for a TSFL Shake - LOL!)